Car Guy and I had the TV on Sunday morning, and for some reason we stopped on a channel that was showing an infomercial for a paint stripper. It was soy-based, and claimed to be safe for skin and fumeless. Of course, it also claimed to do an awesome job pulling paint off whatever home/furniture restoration project one had.
As we've all seen, there's greater emphasis in the market today on natural and environmentally friendly alternatives to products that have, for the last century, been based on petrochemicals. And as long as they work well, I'll admit that I'm willing to jump on that bandwagon. Petrochemicals stink; they're usually harsh and toxic; and there is a limited supply of them as we use up the oil reserves around the world. But that doesn't mean that natural products are all they're portrayed to be.
"All natural - it's healthy!" "Non toxic, because it's natural." "Natural and good for you!" Really? Because arsenic and rattlesnake venom are natural, too, and I'm not going to put those on my morning granola any time soon.
But the part about the paint stripper commercial that really made me laugh was their claim that, "It's organic, so it doesn't smell." Now, I'm not a chemist, nor do I play one on TV. But I always thought that in relation to chemistry, organic meant that something had oxygen in it's makeup. Besides, I'm pretty sure that "organic" can be applied to skunk musk, and that cannot, by any stretch of the imagination, be described as odorless. So why would "organic" indicate "odorless," unless the writers were just trying to get more buzzwords into the spot?
I had the TV on today while I ate lunch. And rather than leave it on the local news. I turned to something trashy. A daytime talk show.
I’ll admit it. I love trashy talk shows. Not quite as trashy as Springer (I don’t like the fighting), but Maury is usually just about right. And today he had one of his top-10 topics: cheating spouses take lie detector tests. Where do they get these people? Are there really that many folks in this country who feel the need to air their dirty laundry on national TV? And how do these people think they can beat a lie detector test that’s administered by a certified technician?
Even better, today’s episode included a couple who had been on a year ago. At that time, the woman revealed to her boyfriend that she had been cheating on him with his uncle, and their 1 year old daughter might actually be the uncle’s. So they took a DNA test, which indicated that the boyfriend was indeed the child’s father. He forgave his girlfriend and they have plans to be married. So why were they on today? Because she’s now cheating on him with his brother.
She told him that, and he had the best reaction I’ve seen on one of these shows. He jumped up from his chair, looked at her, and asked, “What kind of ho are you?”
And just to further the “loser” theme of the hour, there was a commercial for a lawyer that featured an upbeat jingle. Upbeat until I noticed that some of the words included “you won’t lose your house.” Then I took a look at the fine print at the bottom of the screen and noticed that it was for a bankruptcy attorney. “Start to smile while you file bankruptcy today.” And the worst part is that now it’s stuck in my head.
So I'm looking through the circulars and coupons in the Sunday paper, and a title on one ad in the coupon booklet strikes me as particularly funny. It says:
NEW Cat and Dog Recipes from Company*
I know what they meant, which is that they have new flavors, or recipes, of their cat and dog foods. But that's sure not how it sounds. Especially when Car Guy and I have a saying about cats: So many cats, so few recipes. (We're kidding! We'd never eat a cat - too stringy.)
You'd think that a big company like this one would be able to afford a good proofreader to make sure that the real message is conveyed in their ads. Maybe I'll write to them and ask for their cookbook of dog and cat recipes, since the ad doesn't include any.
What stupid things have you seen around town lately?
* Company name has been omitted to protect the stupid.
Just a rant today, people. Please bear with me.
One of my "friends I haven't met" from the internet, Angie (from Take Your Shoes Off and Chef Success) had an unfortunate incident with a credit card company this week.
A little background... Angie and I are both consultants for a kitchenwares company ("Spoiled Cook," rhymes with "Hampered Jeff"). There has been an affiliated credit card that consultants could get that had our products pictured on it and was one of the few accepted forms of payment accepted by our Home Office for some consultant purchases, like supplies. For reasons unknown, Home Office decided to change providers from Chase, to some other little bank that apparently is well known for offering credit cards to people with poor credit then jacking up the rates and fees. And this card will be the only credit card accepted for some consultant payments (we can use our proprietary debit, but sometimes it's nice to have a credit option). I'm already a little miffed that they've switched to a company that has a less than glowing reputation.
It gets worse. Angie is a military spouse, living overseas. She, her husband, and their 2 children are currently living on Okinowa. They have a military address (APO), which works exactly the same as a stateside address, as far as the US Postal Service is concerned. Angie called the new credit card company to apply for her card, and was told that she couldn't get one because they don't take applications from overseas addresses. Excuse me?!? This family is living thousands of miles away from their families and friends, serving this country and you can't give them a card because they have an APO address?
I just don't get it. There are wonderful stories about people helping the military (just check out Lori's site for primo examples), and then some total asshat of a company does something like this.
I've got one of the new cards, but damned if I'm going to use it now.
Sometimes I run across things that can't possibly be serious, but are. I mentally file those away in the "WTF File." (WTF = What the, um... fudge)
Yesterday afternoon I encountered something that made it right to the top of the list. I was driving to a business appointment, and right off the freeway was a billboard for tires. The WTF-factor was called into play because it was for scented tires.
All together now: WTF?
And it's serious. I did a little looking on the net and found a news item and mention on the manufacturer's site. What I don't understand is what the target market is. Are there really people out there who make a habit of sniffing the tires on their car? And the scent is activated by heat. Which means that the lavender scent won't be detectable when the car is sitting in the garage unless it's just pulled in from a trip. Additionally, lavender is a relaxant in aromatherapy. Do we really need to make cars smell like something that will make drivers drowsy?
